Washington, DC - Presidential Press Secretary Robert Gibbs again today neither confirmed nor denied that president Obama is being treated for a rare brain disorder which affects some Kenyan males. The continuing silence from the white house is causing murmuring among the press corps; not that the perfumed princes and princesses of the fourth estate believe that "the people" have a right to know, but because they believe that they themselves have a right to know.

The disorder which is congenital in about 2 - 3% of Kenyan males is known as brain-bowel dysfunction. In simple terms, it is an inoperable plumbing mistake in the body, where the large bowel has a connection to the brain and slowly fills the brain with shit. Persons with this disorder can often be recognized by a surgical scar on the right posterior side of the cranium where the skull is periodically opened to remove the accumulated shit.

Persons afflicted with brain-bowel dysfunction often can lead productive, normal lives under medical supervision and with frequent brain cleaning. Failure to properly treat the condition may lead to bizarre mental behavior and irrational thinking. For further information, see "Shit for Brains."